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Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Top 10 Reasons Hurricane Sandy is worse than Cody Ross

10. Sandy has a girl's name, but still has unlimited masculinity. Ross has a guy's name, but has limited femininity.
9. Sandy causes the most damage near bodies of water. Ross causes the most damage near the Fenway dugout.
8. Ross has one ring. Sandy has tons of them, and they're more powerful than a piece of quartz.
7. Ross looks like a troll. Thanks to her numerous internet memes, Sandy IS one.
6. Sandy has only one eye, but does a lot more with it than Ross' multiple ones.
5. Sandy's caused more damage in a week than Ross has in more than 10 seasons.
4. Sandy is named after a SpongeBob SquarePants character. Ross only acts like one.
3. Ross rains on Yankee fans' parade. Sandy rains on everyone, everywhere.
2. Sandy makes Yankee fans cry. Ross only makes them laugh.
And the number one reason Hurricane Sandy is worse than Cody Ross is...
Only Sandy can do damage to the East Coast. Ross only does damage when he's in San Francisco.

PLAY ME OFF, PAUL!

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