Derek Norris can swim through land.
Derek Norris can speak braille.
Behind Derek Norris' beard, there is no chin; there is only another fist.
Derek Norris doesn't get wet. The water gets Derek Norris.
Superman wears Derek Norris underwear.
The Padres didn't trade for Derek Norris. Derek Norris traded for the Padres.
Derek Norris can catch fastballs without a mitt. He only uses one because he enjoys punishing leather.
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In all seriousness, I really enjoy Derek Norris, and I like how he plays the game. I also appreciate his facial hair. He has that sort of je no sais badass about him.
Coming Tonight (?): He's the big LA rookie that everyone's talking about.
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