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Saturday, December 22, 2012

2012- The Year in Irony

Longtime readers of this blog will probably tell you one thing about me: I get things wrong a lot.

I have been known, several times, to make wild, proud statements about things, only to be proven wrong within a matter of months. Sometimes it's subtle. Sometimes it's funny. Though I'll say that I'm wrong more times than I'm right, the times where I hit it directly on the head are scarce.

So, as we're wrapping up the year with all these lists and retrospects (and I'll do my own, like usual, on New Year's), I'd like to take you back through the year in irony, the year in statements that seemed true at the time, only for them to be wrong months later. And, for extra measure, I've included a few instances where I was really right in predicting the future.

For some reason, we're starting in November 2011.

Nov. 5th, 2011: "Jim Thome will most likely retire in Philly pinstripes." Well, he hasn't retired yet, and he's currently in Orioles garb. Which is still pretty nice.

Nov. 7th 2011: The entire freaking post, about Melky Cabrera. I know, Melky Cabrera tested positive for roids, but all of me saying "he's washed up" and '"he'll never be good again" was so totally wrong.

Nov. 11 2011: "this could be a renaissiance in Miami. People in the area could flock to Miami to see the huge stars, along with the ones they already have, swat homers and make plays. Hell, the Marlins could even be a challenge for Atlanta and Philadelphia for the throne (the Mets are kinda out of it)." My two mistakes here: thinking the Marlins would be good, and neglecting to mention the 5th team in the NL East, the one that would eventually win the damn division. Actually, there was a third- thinking Miami would hold onto most of these people.

Dec. 5 2011: "the Marlins are shaping up to be a huge, colossal force that may, just may, put the Braves in 3rd place." They ended in 2nd, three places above the Marlins. And just to prove I was right about something, "There's a chance that even Washington could kick their ass in the standings."

Dec. 8 2011: "What if Wilson ends up pulling a Kazmir and sucking his ass off for the Angels" Okay, I was kinda right on this one, but he still made an All Star team. And besides, I still said "Add Pujols into the mix, and that awesome pitching rotation, and the Rangers have absolutely no chance to clinch next year. Which is perfect for me, since I hate the Rangers." Well yeah, the Rangers didn't clinch, but neither did the Angels. Also: "The Angels are going to be good next year. What the Yankees need to do is be better than the Angels." The Yanks sure were better. Not by much, though. I'll say that I really hope the 'Angels will rule' posts this year will be ironic by next year.

Dec. 9 2011: On Trumbo, "I don't think he'll be playing first anymore." Well, he still did better than Pujols at it, but I think he's an outfielder now.

Jan. 21 2012: "Right now the A's are practically poo-poo." Give them a few months. "And if they had Manny Ramirez, then they'd be a little less sucky." Well, they never had Manny Ramirez to begin with, but they were less sucky anyway.

Jan. 27 2012: I wanna point out that I prefaced MLB Memes by about 6 months by calling this post 'Juan More Outfielder for Philly'.

March 12 2012: "Hopefully, with a better team, the Dodgers will return to October...until the Phillies win in the end." Wrong annnnnnnnnnnnd wrong.

March 19 2012: The entire post, saying Beltran would be no good, and was just a way to replace Pujols. He wasn't, and had an excellent season. OH! AND ALSO: "they probably won't get back to the postseason without Pujols." Oh, gosh, now that one just HURT!

April 4th 2012: Mistakenly insinuating that A-Rod can still hit.

April 20th 2012: All of the stuff about the Orioles being in a tough spot, and how they'd always be in last.

April 22nd 2012: On David Freese: "Allow me to break the ice- the home run last year will be his defining act. He's the David Tyree of the MLB." He actually had a better season this year, which wasn't good for a Freese hater like me. Also, I just got that Freeze/ice joke, and I wrote the damn thing.

April 23rd 2012: " Hopefully we'll have a stronger May and June." Nope. The Phils kept sucking for the rest of the summer. They still had a decent August and September though.

April 29th 2012: "There, I said it Topps. Don't screw up with Harper." Yeah, they hammered him pretty well.

May 8th 2012: Brief summary of this post "Javy Guerra is a great closer and will be closing for the rest of the season!" "He got hurt, idiot" "Uhhhh....exit, stage right!"

May 28th 2012: "the two teams everyone thought would end up in last (Royals and White Sox) have been playing pretty well" By the end of the season, both teams would be shaking their heads.

June 14th 2012: "The man you see above currently holds the best ERA in the NL." Just days after I wrote this post, Beachy was yanked onto the DL. Oops.

June 16th 2012: "He's currently the Orioles' top ace." Days after I posted this one, Matusz got hurt and was switched to the bullpen. Oops?

June 19th 2012: "At least they still have Beckett." By the end of the season Beckett would be gone and Dice-K would be on the DL again.

June 30th 2012: On Brian Roberts: "I hope his injury-free streak sticks around awhile, too." It didn't.

July 5th 2012: On Zack Greinke: "So if and when this guy gets traded, I hope it's to a team that needs him." Did the Angels really need him? No. Do the Dodgers? Yes, they certainly do.

July 9th 2012: "Currently the Nationals, Pirates and White Sox are all in first place in their respective divisions"By the season's end, only one would still be atop their division, and look what happened to them.

August 20th 2012: "Hopefully, Adam will keep that arm healthy for a while." He didn't.

September 11th 2012: "Chris Sale and David Price are close behind, but it's Verlander's year." Price would end up taking the Cy Young from Verlander, in a controversial, but still kinda fitting, decision.

October 11th 2012:  On a picture of David Freese, "In other news...this guy neeeds to break a bone." Well...he, uh...he did. I brought this piece of irony to light the week of the car accident, but man, that one hurt.

November 7th 2012: " I want 2013 to have absolutely NOBODY to come out and say "hey, I took steroids." It really makes me mad, because then I'll lose respect for them, too." Not even a month later, my boy Chooch was outed for steroid use. NOT EVEN A MONTH LATER! Boy am I wrong a lot.


So, to sum up, I was incorrect countless times this year, especially in places where it counted. This is one of the best blogs to just read a year ago. I'm probably the worst oracle in the world, and I eat it up. In fact...here are five things I know aren't gonna come true:

1. Bonds, Clemens inducted into Baseball Hall of Fame, along with Jose Mesa.
2. Padres clinch their division.
3. Astros get a higher place in the division than the Angels.
4. Jason Bay will be named MVP
5. The Dodgers and White Sox will play each other in the World Series. And I say this because I myself predict it to happen.

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