Monday, July 6, 2026

Paperweight Beats Rock

 


The Minnesota Twins really just won a series against the Yankees in the Bronx. And honestly, somehow, they deserved to.

It's been no secret that since mid-June the Yankees have been spiraling out of control. In fact, I may have been in attendance for the last time the Yankees actually felt like a dominant winning team, their excellent shutout of the Reds. Immediately after that they've lost all direction. The team's stopped hitting, management keeps sending down players who are doing well because they've got options left, Gerrit Cole keeps giving up runs, and the absence of Judge is feeling more and more evident. Ben Rice initially looked like he'd fill that void, but since that Reds game where he had a 3-run shot, he's been hitting .135 with 7 hits, 3 home runs and 15 strikeouts. The whole team's gone cold, including him. So us losing another series? Why not at this rate.

But the Twins?? On paper you'd think they were directionless, but somehow they've become one of the sneakiest bad teams in baseball. They're not supposed to compete, but they're skirting through the middle of the AL Central, hanging around .500, winning big against great teams solely because they can. They are without Ryan Jeffers right now, and the fear is that they're about to lose Byron Buxton to a hip issue [because that man couldn't be any more cursed]. But barring that they've had a really surprising lineup, filled with guys like Luke Keaschall, Kody Clemens, Austin Martin, Brooks Lee and Trevor Larnach, who aren't burning the house down but are providing steady work. They've even got Josh Bell bringing his usual brand of cheesy power, with 13 homers and 59 RBIs, meaning there's an outside chance Bell nabs a 100 RBI year. I'm not sure if he'll finish it with the Twins, but considering he only has one to date, it'd be a pretty cool achievement. 

The Twins are not a better baseball team than the Yankees, but right now only one of these teams has any spark or unpredictability, and it's not the friggin Yankees. The Twins have guys that you're gonna underestimate and they make you pay anyway. Keaschall and Lee have been so hot recently that they're both on my fantasy team. Ryan Kreisler has 5 homers and 23 RBIs as a bench bat. Alex Jackson is somehow hitting .300 as a backup. They're getting quality starts from Connor Prielipp, Zebby Matthews and Mike Paredes, who are mostly around to fill in for Pablo Lopez, Mick Abel and Bailey Ober and eat innings. Matthews is looking the most MLB-ready yet, and despite a 4.43 ERA has a 1.164 WHIP. Yoendrys Gomez went from a roster hanger-onner to an MLB closer. There's genuine unpredictability to this team, and it's very much appreciated. The Yankees are what you see. Ryan Weathers and Will Warren are gonna get up there and strike you out but leave homer possibilities on the table, so of course you go for it. Jazz Chisholm's gonna make an error or strike out 3 times. Camilo Doval's gonna shit the bed. I'm not saying we're always gonna be this predictable, but we were this series, and the Twins took advantage.

The Twins have the Guardians and Angels up next before the break, and because of the jester's privilege they've received in the AL, no matter how these series' go it might not even matter. They may sell, but I don't even think they'll need to sell Buxton or Ryan. They may just gestate as a spoiler the whole rest of the year. Meanwhile, the Yankees need to get to a point where they're not being tripped up by someone like the Twins. 

Coming Tonight: A young infielder who seems to finally be getting some ample battery-mates.

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