Uncustomed Heroes of 2025: Rockies

 

I'm sure you're all spending today cleaning up after Christmas, getting rid of all the ripped up wrapping paper and boxes, spent on leftovers and watching reruns on TV, and I won't even blame you if none of you want to read a post on the 2025 Rockies. Like if this post gets zero page views, then honestly it deserves it. There's a list on the sidebar of the ten most viewed posts, mostly bolstered by bot usage or random spikes or whatever, and if this one ends up on that list then I'll know it's time to end the blog, because if this shit is being rewarded then there's no point.

The 2025 Rockies were an extremely bad baseball team. Any talent was either too injured to contribute, too young to make an impact, too burnt-out to manage anything, or simply couldn't keep pitches away from people at Coors Field. This is a team with Kris Bryant, German Marquez, Kyle Freeland, Mickey Moniak and Orlando Arcia, and if you were to hear that eight years ago you'd have gone 'oh, that sounds like a decent team, right?' This team couldn't even win 45 games. If it weren't for an alarming number of wins against the Cardinals and Diamondbacks, this team would have been even worse than the 2024 White Sox. Imagine that! That was already the bar for ineptitude. And here come the Rockies, with no pitching, like 2 good hitters and a crap-ton of replacement level guys, and they're rivaling it. 

The Rockies' bullpen had a surprising number of clear standouts. Jake Bird before the trade. Jimmy Herget. Ultimately Victor Vodnik, a homegrown relief weapon with a name like a James Bond villain and an imposing stare to match. Vodnik's 1.8 WAR made him the third most valuable Rockie this year, behind Herget and Hunter Goodman, and he had a 3.02 ERA in 52 appearances, despite a 1.401 WHIP. His 10 saves also means he may rival Seth Halvorsen for the ninth next year.

2026 Prediction: Yeah there's no way he's lasting the whole year here, he's way too good for Denver.

Dropped from the Rangers' roster to make room for, I'm assuming, Merrill Kelly or one of the other deadline pickups, 1st baseman Blaine Crim's first season in the bigs was looking like it was getting off to a horrid start. But then the Rockies came calling, and plugged Crim into the lineup for 15 games as a replacement for Michael Toglia. Crim responded with an excellent stretch, with an .851 OPS, 12 RBIs and 5 homers, a fitting power burst for a team with nothing left to lose.

2026 Prediction: Well, the Rockies don't exactly have a lot of options, so he starts the majority of games at 1st and hits 25 homers.

Coming Tomorrow- So many Kansas City Royals.