Your 2018 All-Star Game Starting Lineups

A routine on the blog. Every year, I don't just say 'Happy All-Star Game day'. No, I roll out the starting lineups like it's my damn business. As if you're in the stadium, which I wish I was right now.

Without further ado, HERE ARE YOUR 2018 ALL-STAR GAME STARTING LINEUPS!

FIRST, THE AMERICAN LEAGUE ALL-STARS

Leading off for the AL, the right fielder, from the Boston Red Sox...MOOKIE...BETTS.

Batting second, playing second base tonight, from the WORLD CHAMPION HOUSTON ASTROS....JOSE ALTUVE!

Third tonight for the AL, the centerfielder...from the Los Angeles Angels...MIKE...TROUT!

Batting cleanup for the AL, the designated hitter, from the Boston Red Sox...J.D. MARTINEZ!

Batting fifth, the third baseman, from the Cleveland Indians...JOSE RAMIREZ!

Batting sixth tonight, and playing left field...from the New York Yankees....AARON...JUDGE!

Batting seventh, the shortstop...at the moment, from the Baltimore Orioles....MANNY MACHADO!!

[Phillies and Dodgers fans begin brawling in the stands. Renegade Baltimore fans cheer, as it is Washington after all]

In the eighth spot tonight, the first baseman, from the Chicago White Sox....JOSE ABREU!

Batting ninth, and catching this evening, from the Kansas City Royals...SALVADOR PEREZ!

And pitching tonight for the American league, from the Boston Red Sox...CHRIS...SALE!

And now...the NATIONAL LEAGUE STARTING LINEUPS!

First, leading off tonight for the NL, the second baseman, from the Chicago Cubs...JAVIER BAEZ!

Batting second, and starting at third base tonight, from the Colorado Rockies...NOLAN ARENADO!

In the third spot, acting as the designated hitter tonight for the NL, from the Arizona Diamondbacks...PAUL GOLDSCHMIDT!

Batting cleanup for the NL, the first baseman, from the Atlanta Braves...FREDDIE FREEMAN!

Batting fifth tonight, the left fielder, from the Los Angeles Dodgers...MATT KEMP!

...AND BATTING SIXTH TONIGHT-
[the crowd already is going apeshit]
THE CENTERFIELDER, FROM YOOOOUR WASHINGTON NATIONALS. BRYCE....HARPER!
[PANDAEMONIUM]

[Applause eventually dies down]

At seventh in the lineup tonight, the right fielder, from the Atlanta Braves...NICK MARKAKIS!

Batting eighth tonight, playing shortstop, from the San Francisco Giants...BRANDON CRAWFORD!

Batting ninth, and catching this evening, from the Chicago Cubs...WILLSON CONTRERAS!

And starting on the mound tonight for the NL...FROM YOUR WASHINGTON NATIONALS, THE REIGNING CY YOUNG CHAMPION... MAX....SCHERZER!!!!
[More immense cheering from the audience]

Those are your lineups. Let's hope for a fun little game tonight.