Wednesday, April 28, 2010

The Worst Autograph Tournament- Round one

This blog will be the homefield for the 2nd region of the tournament. The Jeter Region

Our Matchups-

One Seed- Jason Jennings

Uhh, okay. Jason looks to be in 1st grade, being optioned to write his name for the first time.

He'll be facing off against the 16 seed, Prince Fielder

Okay, that is not an autograph. It looks like a picture of a Picasso-esque banjo and guitar combo.

Our next matchup, the old 8 v. 9 battle. The 8, in this case, is Mike Minor

Simple, Mike. A little too simple. By the way, who are you?

His opponent in this matchup and our number 9, number 9, will be an ex-Philly prospect, Marlon Byrd.

Now we know a good reason why this Byrd has Flown...

(Crickets chirping...)

Moving onto another battle, The 5 seed, Melvin Mora

According to the graph, Melvin's nickname is MMMMMMMMMMMM!

His adversary? Gabe Kapler, our number 12 seed.

I didn't know Gabe was german...
Our next matchup features a promising prospect...Johnny Cueto, our #4.

Autograph, no. Elementary school lunchbox etching. Yes.

And providing a good clean fight is another prospect- the thirteenth seeded auto, Travis Snyer.

TS...S. I think we could guess what Travis' middle initial is. His name...not so much.

Our next battle pits together two strong men currently on Eastern teams. First, Luis Castillo, a current met, and seeded sixth.

Yeah...what is that?

And his nemesis for the round? None other than Migeul Tejada, seeded at number 11.

He must have really been in a hurry. Literally. His auto really wants to get the heck off the card!

Another battle for you- Current Yankee vs. former Yankee. Up first- the Current. Nick Swisher, our number three seed.

eJel? Is that your Hebreu name or something? Is that the name of the product you're selling?

And here's the former Yankee. Not many people know this, but Carl Everett started out with the Yankees in the early 90's. Yet somehow he wound up with the Marlins...and as our #14 seed.

From the looks of it, it is a turtle speeding away from a snake on a Segway.
What am I, an art geek?

Our penultimate matchup features two young stars in new uniforms. The Yankee goes first. Curtis Granderson, seeded seventh.

K...M. Okay, Curtis...who's KM?

And in the other corner of the ring, our Seattle Mariner, Chone Figgins who is our number 10.
All I see is a couple of big circles...what do you see?
And finally we have Former Prospect that never was great, and Former Prospect that never was. Bobby Bonilla could have been Bonds. Instead, he wound up being washed up and incredible. And he's number 2. Here's why.

I didn't know Bobby Bo was a pretzel lover! Who'da thunk?
Lastly, the failed prospect- here's Michael Burgess. I don't know either. But he's still our fifteenth seeded auto.

I'm too tired to make a comment about this one. Anyone think of one out there?
Well, those are our matchups. Polls are in the sidebar, so go on and vote. And if you want to see the other regions check out these three blogs.


  1. If football autos were included Vernand Morency would win hands down

  2. Rocco- I think he's in one of the other brackets at a 1 seed. Check Drewscards or On Card Autos