The Stars Are Out: The Rest of 2024

 

Another year where I kept forgetting to find moments to post the Stars Are Out customs. Topps bringing back the First Pitch insert set may have contributed to this as well, since they're documenting first pitches I'm only sort of needed, cause I kinda only do the cool niche ones anyhow. No matter. There was still some left, so before I start rolling out 2025 customs, here they are.

I'm starting with Patrick Willis, not only because he's one of the few sports-related first pitches I documented in this batch, but because I've met the man. Million years ago, back when he was still playing with the 49ers, a mutual friend introduced me. Great guy, soft spoken. Treated me like an equal, despite me being young and decidedly not an All-Pro linebacker. Willis was one of the best of his era, and he deserved his HOF enshrinement. Awesome that he still gets a nice welcome in SF.

The Braves had two different OMG music stars take up the pregame this past year for first pitches. Somehow Usher, the bigger star of the two, had the comparatively humbler approach. Usher's still a really big deal, and his Super Bowl halftime show was very good. There were a ton of photos to choose from of him at Truist Field, this was a pretty good one. Then Ludacris not only did a first pitch, but did so in this insane getup, with massive arms and massive feet. That's the real feet there, trying to throw out the first pitch with massive foam hands. Subtlety isn't exactly Luda's strong suit, but hey, it's certainly an original one.

Advertising mascots. ADVERTISING MASCOTS THROWING OUT FIRST PITCHES. This is where we're at, people. This is the degree of modern capitalism here. I think Jake from State Farm did one last year as well. Wondering who's next. LiMu Emu and Doug? The Aflac duck? The Green M&M? 

Arguably as confusing as an advertising mascot throwing out the first pitch, Jared Leto throwing one out at a Mets game. I'm still not sure what Jared Leto's deal is. If his acting's meant to be like that on purpose or not. He also just shows up places randomly. Last April fool's day he was randomly hosting Wheel of Fortune, and it was never addressed. Why him? Why Wheel of Fortune? Why are we validating the guy that starred in 'Morbius'?? Who knows. I don't even know if he's a Mets fan at all. Chloe Grace Moretz did one at CitiField, and her I can buy as a Mets fan. Jared Leto...does he even know what sports are?

So the Guardians have essentially adopted Machine Gun Kelly, and gave him his own promotion last year. I like that they're giving back to a famous Clevelander who loves the team and wears his Ohio upbringing on his sleeve, but right as the sun is rising on the Guardians as a league threat, the sun is setting on Machine Gun Kelly as a credible musician. Like, what has this man done in the past two years that's in any way worthy of preservation? Hell, the Guardians seem to be alright with the fact that MGK's walkoff win during the Celebrity Softball Game was done under the influence of hallucinogenics, so I don't know if they really can be too choosy right now. He's theirs, and he likes coming to games...and the Kelces are harder to get. 

We'll end on these two, these are much cooler rock music gets. Jerry Cantrell is the driving creative force behind Alice in Chains, he's not only the reason their songs kicked so much ass in the 90s but he's the reason for their underrated 2009-2018 comeback, where he honestly held his own as lead singer. Alice in Chains is a very cool band, and Cantrell, though doing his solo thing right now, is a rock legend. He's not from Ohio, but he rolled through Cleveland and the Guards thought 'what the hell'. 

Tom DeLonge, meanwhile, is from San Diego, and wears his SoCal roots on his sleeve. DeLonge was doing his own thing for a bit, running Angels and Airwaves, searching for UFOs, but he's back with Blink-182 now and they're...at least making successful music. I can't say it's as good as their 2000s stuff, even as someone sort of ambivalent towards it. But he's happy, healthy, thriving, and probably still chasing UFOs. Good to see him throw one out in San Diego. 

It remains to be seen if I'll be doing more of these this year. I might anyway. Topps is gonna go for the big stars and probably not for the fun ones I care about. So I guess there's a niche carved out for me anyhow.

The Stars are Out: June & July 2024

 

In the interim between the last Stars are Out post and this one, Topps actually decided to bring back their First Pitch insert set. Unfortunately they only made it a 5 card set. So...I still have a reason to do Stars are Out customs. Nice effort, though.

So let's start with one of the obvious ones. Last month Snoop Dogg stopped by a Brewers game and everyone lost their minds. He threw out a first pitch, sat in the broadcasters' booth and watched an Elly de la Cruz home run, it was huge. I kinda love that this guy's just able to laze around and do whatever he wants. He's at the Olympics now cheering on the US team, he's having a ball. Good for him, honestly.

Speaking of this current moment in US sports history, this is an awesome one. Brittney Griner had a rough run of things for a few years, had a whole ordeal being trapped in Russia, finally came back and got right back to business in the WNBA. This has been her homecoming year, and I'm glad she's been able to be back at this level. The D-Backs fans must have given her a warm welcome when she threw out a first pitch. 

Marcello Hernandez, the latest SNL cast member to get big less by being funny and more by being conventionally good looking, has become a big part of MLB's Beisbol initiative, being a Latino baseball fan who has enough presence to engage the latinx community and bring that audience in. He's done the Celebrity Softball game two years in a row now, he's in ads by MLB, and the Marlins decided to bring him over and have him do a first pitch. He's from that area of Florida I think, he loves the game. I kinda wish he had a better Marlins moment to boast about but there ya are.

Speaking of honestly,

When Bad Boys: Ride or Die [spoiler alert: they rode] came out, the Marlins rolled out the red carpet for Will Smith and Martin Lawrence for making Miami a cultural superpower again in the 2020s. I did not see similar activity with Eddie Murphy at a Tigers game when Beverly Hills Cop 4 came out, but hey, the Bad Boys movies actually feature in movie theaters, so I kinda get it. Lawrence was the one who threw out the first pitch. Clearly his career isn't where Smith's is, but he's also never assaulted a comedian for makistarred in Suicide Squad. 

Speaking of the summer in movies, Tony Hale was in Inside Out 2 this summer as Fear. I obviously know him best for roles in Arrested Development and Veep, but he's been getting a lot of high profile roles onscreen, which is very good. He's a naturally funny guy, and he deserves the Disney money. He does seem very worried about where his Globe Life Field first pitch is heading, and if memory serves it didn't cross the plate. 

Jason Alexander famously made baseball news earlier this month when the Yankees had a George Costanza bobblehead giveaway that was frigging gone by the time I got to the stadium that night [I personally blame MTA]. I did love his response to the bobblehead, he seems very touched by the admiration for his character. His baseball loyalties lie elsewhere, as he and documented Cubs fanatic Joe Mantegna combined for a joint First Pitch at Wrigley late in May. I love how seriously Alexander takes acting, and how much more of an actor he is than a pure celebrity. 

Also in the category of rad Cubs first pitches, Cheap Trick guitarist Rick Nielsen, flicker of picks and scowler of audience members, did one at Wrigley. A cousin of mine is close with his son I believe, and he's told me stories of texting Nielsen on the runway heading to New York. Nielsen's apparently a cool guy, which isn't surprising. Also, for the record, I have seen Cheap Trick live, like 20 years ago, and they are, in fact, that awesome. 

I think Gordon Ramsay opened a new restaurant in Boston this summer. Obviously he's not from Boston, Hell's Kitchen would be a much different show if he cursed people out in a Boston accent rather than a British accent. But he was in town, and the Sox gave him the ball because they too like over the top television villains. I like the fact that it's clear that Ramsay plays up the anger for the cameras and when he's giving people criticism in competition shows he's just direct more than anything, and he's actually a decent human being at the end of the day.

We'll end on the two first pitches they rolled out for the London Series

I think the Mets' rationale was to get a famous New York resident who wouldn't be out of place in London. Hence Matthew Broderick, who's routinely doing something on Broadway. Broderick got to rock Mets colors, which must have been a wake-up call to Cameron Frye, and represent Queens, which is very fitting. This is very much a classy pick more than anything. 

So Philly went for the flashy pick:

Rob McElhenney is not only a red-blooded Philadelphia sports fan, and he's not only beloved in the UK thanks to his Welcome to Wrexham series, but there's literally a running gag on his show about how he's always wanted to play catch with Chase Utley. So for the second game of the London Series, Mac got to play catch with both Utley and Bryce Harper, with wife Kaitlin Olson nearby, and it was as fun as you'd expect. I kinda love how embedded into Philly culture McElhenney, and the Always Sunny cast, have become, and this is just the next step.

Hopefully there'll be some more fun ones in the next few months. 

The Stars are Out: April & May 2024

 

My recurring series on famous people throwing out the first pitch at MLB games continues, and I was able to find 10 fun subjects for the first two months of the season.

It should not shock you that I'm starting this post with Jason Kelce. The man has epitomized Philly sports for damn near a decade, and is now making the leap to full-on sports personality. It's upsetting to me that until this decade, because he's a defenseman, Kelce didn't have many football cards, or even a proper rookie card from Topps. His brother Travis got one, clearly [and I'm keeping that pretty damned safe], but not Jason. This should do the trick, Jason throwing one out at a Phils game early on in the season. It's clear this city still loves him, and always will.

Brock Purdy, despite getting the 49ers to a Super Bowl, has gotten so much backlash from NFL fans, because they think that anybody could have gotten this Niners team to a Super Bowl, and it's clear because he didn't win it. I call bollocks on that, I think Purdy did a lot right this year, and there's a lot to him that couldn't have been done with, like, Jimmy G or whoever. But the SF fans seem to appreciate him, as they should, and he got a warm welcome to Oracle Park to throw one out.

Similarly, Amon-Ra St. Brown was on my fantasy team this past year, and I'm extremely satisfied with how well he did. The Lions really have something with this guy, and he's been terrific ever since coming up. He also seems genuinely great for the fanbase. I wish I could say that about everyone who did well for my fantasy this year, but uh...my kicker isn't exactly popular with fans right now. Anyway, St. Brown's a Lions hero, the Tigers fans love him as well, and he's in one of the Tigers' City Connect uniforms, which ended up being a theme for this post.

Rob Gronkowski knows who he is, and I like that about him. He's made a name for himself playing the idiot, and those insurance ads work because he plays right into it. He's also, y'know, an insanely talented TE and a Boston sports legend. I think that gave him the leeway to do a spike for a first pitch, seen here. He could toss it into the outfield and they'd still love him there.

Since it's been SIXTY YEARS since his debut, the Giants invited Masanori Murakami, the first ever Japanese player to play in the MLB, back to throw out a first pitch. That's genuinely awesome. I think about how much Murakami paved the way for, people like Yu Darvish, Shohei Ohtani and Shota Imanaga owe their careers to him. And San Francisco's such a progressive city that it had to happen there, and they probably gave him an overwhelming round of applause. 

Similarly, the Dodgers have had a history of being very kind to Japanese and Asian players, and it's resulted in a nice fanbase there from Asian emigrants. This also means the occasional Japanese actor can throw out a first pitch at Dodger Stadium, as Shogun, Bullet Train and...Lost Season 6 actor Hiroyuki Sanada did in April. Sanada was described, circa his Lost stint, as 'Japan's actor to Harrison Ford', and thankfully now he's getting more roles that really showcase his excellent acting skills. 

I've been prone to do customs of Jeopardy champions on here, because I'm that kind of nerd. I think I've done ones of Ken Jennings, James Holzhauer and Amy Schneider, and now I've done one of Ben Chan, who was a recent Tournament of Champions finalist, and a self-professed Green Bay Packers fanatic. He was a really fun player who deserved better luck, and I'm glad he got his chance from the Brewers here.

Here's another City Connect first pitch. For the debut of their NYC-centric grays, the Mets figured they should hand the ball to a local rap legend, namely Busta Rhymes, who was huge in the late 90s and early 2000s. He seems pretty stoked to be a part of this, as he's a New Yorker through and through.

Similarly, Noah Kahan, in his landmark debut record, wrote a lot of songs about growing up in a small town in New England where everybody knows everybody. Moreover, he wrote a lot of songs about wanting to LEAVE a small town in New England where everybody knows everybody. But the Stick Season and Dial Drunk singer/songwriter is true to his New Englander roots, and got a hero's welcome in Fenway. It's odd, because Kahan's music isn't technically country because he's not from the South, but I file him in the Springsteen/Billy Joel category of 'country music, but for people from the Northeast'. Cause the songwriting mentality is pretty much the same. Happy he's having his moment, though.

We'll end on a fun one. I started watching The Bear earlier this year. God what a great show that is. Excellent writing, character development, storytelling, music. Insanely relatable story about a restauranteur trying to make it happen in Chicago. They film in Chicago, and it's a very Chicago cast, and rightfully the cast is welcome anytime they want in Wrigley. I think Ebon-Moss Bacharach did a 7th Inning Stretch, Matty Matheson definitely did a first pitch, and they're all there for filming, so they're easy to get pretty much. So here's Lisa Colon-Zayas, longtime character actor [she was in United 93!], finally getting her due playing Tina, one of the most intriguing and ultimately likable characters we see in that kitchen, getting a nice applause in Chicago. I love that. That's gotta feel great.

Look forward to more of these hitting the blog after another month or so of first pitches.

The Stars Are Out: August & September 2023

 

What a sight this is. Bartolo Colon, after a 5 year retirement limbo period, finally officially ended his MLB career last month as a member of the New York Mets, a team that held him for just three seasons, all past what would normally be considered a pitcher's prime. One of the most unexpected developments of the last decade of baseball was the return, and deification, of Bartolo Colon. The Mets fans still love Colon, and that home run he hit against the Padres is still one of the greatest things to me. I half considered taking a train to Queens just to be in attendance for this one, but decided against it.

Bartolo Colon throwing out the first pitch for the Mets is one of a few interesting sights I collected in the final two months of the 2023, to benefit the still-ongoing Stars Are Out series.

Richard Sherman once told a close member of my family that he'd never come back to a Seahawks game again. Not long after leaving Seattle, he was still disillusioned about how things left off, and while several people tried explaining to him that he'd clearly get a hero's welcome in that stadium, despite the end of his Hawks tenure, he was still not having it. Things clearly must have changed, as Sherman decided to return to T-Mobile Stadium this year, decked in one of those swanky City Connect jerseys, to throw out a first pitch. I'm glad he's come around, he's a very crucial part of 2010s Seattle sports.

I know next to nothing about the WNBA. I know two names- Sue Bird and Diana Taurasi. And I only know Taurasi because Lebron James recognized her talent enough to include her as one of the Monstars in the vastly inferior sequel to Space Jam. Taurasi's one of the all-time greats of the sport, is just winding down her career, and is clearly a legend in Phoenix, where she threw out a first pitch last month.

Similarly, Megan Rapinoe just rounded the last curve of her USWNT career, after a host of medals and big moments in the World Cup. The US team's first place dreams ended early this year, which means Rapinoe didn't exactly end on the high that her former teammates Carli Lloyd and Abby Wambach did, but she still finished things off with dignity. I really like the old school Mariners jacket she's wearing here for her T-Mobile Park first pitch.

I think this one can be explained as simply as 'Garth Brooks was in town'. I don't think he's residing anywhere near the Kansas City area, I'm pretty sure he's still back in Oklahoma City though, let me be clear, I don't know much at all about country music. I can name one Garth Brooks song. Friends in Low Places. That's it. His music didn't exactly reach northeastern mainstream radio when I was growing up. He's still a legend, and he's done so much for legitimizing country music. I'm sure he got a warm welcome from Royals fans when he threw this one out.

In the same vein, Mike Love's connection with the Cleveland metropolitan area is similarly tenuous. As a member of the Beach Boys, Love is clearly from California, as that's basically a requirement for entry into the band. I think the band, or moreover Love's 'No Wilsons Allowed' reformation of the band that's fought to tarnish the group's reputation for 35-odd years now, was passing through Ohio and Love thought 'why not'. Also, Mike's nephew used to play basketball in Cleveland, so maybe that's what it is. Either way, Mike Love got a nice response, because at the end of the day he is still a rock legend, despite also being a genuinely terrible human being.

Kyle Mooney is one of those fringe comedy guys that either works for you or doesn't. I always liked him on Saturday Night Live, and thought he had more of an odder edge to him than usual comedy partner Beck Bennett. He was usually misused on the show, and he's now trying his best to find similarly rewarding post-SNL work. But it's kinda awesome that he got a first pitch out of it all; a lot of his early sketches mention SoCal, and the San Diego area, prominently, complete with I believe a 90s-era Padres cap. So this is a true fan pick, and I'm glad he was able to make it happen.

And these two kinda caught me off guard. Like...Hit Girl? Mets fan? Sure. Chloe Grace Moretz has spent the last decade or so being in practically everything; now she's in mediocre action films. She definitely has a nice career for herself, even though she may never be in something as memorable as something like Kick-Ass. But hey, she's a Mets fan, and she got a warm CitiField welcome.

And then you have Ayo Edebiri, who, between a prominent role in Hulu's The Bear, playing April O'Neil in the latest animated iteration of TMNT, and being in Bottoms, one of the funniest studio comedies in a while, has been having an excellent year. I'd call her similar to a Sydney Sweeney 'she's one of ours? get her in here before the star fades' pick for the Sox, though Edebiri thankfully did not curse the team like Sweeney did last year. I hope Edebiri's career keeps going, she's a fun, versatile young actress with a lot of great uses this year.

That's all for the regular season, though I'm sure there'll be some cool ones during the postseason.

The Stars are Out: May to July 2023

 The thing about doing this series for 8 years is that I've gotta avoid dupes. Which explains why there hasn't been as many Stars Are Out profiles as usual. A lot of people I can take or leave, or people I've already done, throwing out the first pitch these days. The good news is there are occasionally diamonds in the rough, but this is the highlights of two and a half months. That's...less than ideal. But hey, it's better than nothing.

Biggest one first- before getting drafted by the Spurs, clearly a team that needs help getting a title [sarcasm implied, they win every decade or so], Victor Wembanyama, the biggest surefire NBA legend since...well, Zion Williamson, made an appearance at Yankee Stadium to throw out a first pitch. A lot like Giannis a few years ago, there's no regional correlation, he was just in town while being hot shit and he'd make news just throwing one out in the Bronx. Wemby's gonna be huge in the bigs, hopefully he proceeds to have great health and put up nothing against the Sixers.

Not the only NBA guy that made it to a ballpark this stretch. Paul George I remember most from a horrible injury he had about a decade ago, but he rebounded nicely and has remained a big star for the Clippers. George is from the greater San Diego area, hence him throwing one out at a Padres game rather than a Dodgers or Angels game. 

Charles Tillman was a Bears legend that is a rare grown man who's alright being called 'Peanut'. He's a rare defenseman to have his own play named after him, 'the Peanut Punch'. If you get something named after you, either you've done it really right or really wrong. Along with Will Shields, Tillman's the second Stars are Out guy I've done that my dad has worked with in some capacity.

I try to pick only the more interesting ex-MLBers for this series, and Dennis Martinez seemed like one of those to me. A true ageless wonder, Martinez was a star in the 80s for the Orioles, then became a mainstay with the Expos and Indians into his 40s, with a no-hitter on top of it all. A fantastic pitcher, and somebody that Bartolo Colon, Jamie Moyer and Rich Hill owe a lot to. Kinda cool that Martinez is still welcome at Camden Yards, even if in my opinion he accomplished the least there in the long run despite the long tenure on the O's.

I think it's okay to like Chris Tucker again, guys. Wasn't cool for a bit in the 2000s, now everybody's come around, realized that him being annoying in Fifth Element was kinda the point. He talks fast and he's annoying, he's supposed to be. You're not gonna stand here and tell me Rush Hour doesn't work because of him. He's the perfect foil to Jackie Chan. Tucker seemed excited to be at Dodger Stadium for this, hopefully his career uptick post-Silver-Linings-Playbook continues.

Rosario Dawson, meanwhile, has endured a nice renaissance since her role in the Netflix Daredevil series, as her status as a formidable, kickass female lead got her the role of an adult version of Ahsoka Tano in both The Mandalorian and the upcoming Ahsoka Disney+ series. Dawson's a New Yorker at heart, and broke big not only in the NYC indie community in the 90s, but as a true New York pizza worker in the extremely flawed Men in Black 2. Of course she's remained a Mets fan, and of course she still looks good in Mets colors.

We'll end on a cool one. The Atlanta rap scene is so legendary down there that OutKast gets their own promotion night. Because it's apparently commonplace for the venn diagram of Braves fans and OutKast fans to intersect greatly enough for a well-attended OutKast Night. I know, I know, the cultural makeup of the Atlanta general area does make it a bit easier. But it's also cool that, as OutKast has been bronzed into Atlanta legend by this point, we still have both members alive and performing to this day. And that means Big Boi can throw out the first pitch at a Braves game, in a full throwback uniform. So that's pretty damn cool.

I reckon there will be more on the next check-in, but...who knows.

The Stars Are Out: All-Star Celebrity Softball Edition

 

I usually have some fun making customs of people that took part in the annual All-Star week Celebrity Softball game, which grabs sports and media personnel from around the area of the ASG home city and pits them all against each other in a friendly softball game, and this year was no exception. I will note before I get into things that this year's crop of participants felt a bit lighter than usual. They've been able to get relatively big people in the past, like the time they got Machine Gun Kelly to hit a game-winning home run while high on acid, or the time the Nationals wound up calling in Bill Nye the goddamned Science Guy to hop in. This year had some good picks, but a lot of lower-key ones.

Also, a few people that I'd done customs of before [Felix Hernandez, Ryan Howard, Joel McHale], and a few people that seemed to be regulars at this point [Chloe Kim, Jojo Siwa, Jennie Finch who's never missed one yet]. There were a few former Mariners, but not as many as you might think; other than Bret Boone, only really Mike Cameron stood out to me as someone worthy of as custom. Cameron was a big part of the M's 2001 team, and was one of the more consistent outfield bats of his era. 

Cameron wasn't the biggest ex-MLB-er out there, as Adam Jones, a former Mariners prospect himself, was a big part of his squad, and even had some time on the mound. Jones is still pretty well-liked in Seattle, even if the majority of his playing days were spent in Baltimore. 

There were actually a lot of NBA talent at T-Mobile Park for this. Donovan Mitchell, the Cavs' standout of the moment, showed up repping his hometown Mets and palling around with people like Ryan Howard and Joel McHale.

Similarly, current Bulls favorite Zach LaVine, who's actually from Washington state, had a nice hit during the game. Even if there were a lot of usual suspects in this game, it was nice to see some native Northwesterners having a good time.

A few fringe picks I got a kick out of- Skylar Astin was in all the Pitch Perfect movies and now stars on CBS's So Help Me Too. His Pitch Perfect cast member Adam Devine was also in the game, though on the opposing team.

And my favorite one was Marcello Hernandez. This time last year, Hernandez was an anonymous stand-up, and one year of SNL work later he's in the ASG week festivities. Nice to see him repping the Marlins, as you rarely see many people in these games from that part of the country.

Relatively fun stuff from this lot, hopefully next year in Arlington breaks out a few more interesting names.