Sunday, December 22, 2013

Football Predictions: Week 16

Yes, I love that custom, showcasing the helmets that are basically the highlight of the Jaguars' season.

Today is a crucial day, as most people's playoff chances come down to today's games, and a lot of people are going to clinch. I'll heavily detail the playoff-ish games today, and sort of sift through the other ones.

1 PM GAMES:

Dolphins vs. Bills:
Two teams that started pretty well, and then it all went downhill for both. However, which one's better?
Who should win: Dolphins
Who will win: Dolphins. For no other reason, except that I like Tannehill.
Overall: Dolphins over Bills.

Vikings vs. Bengals:
THIS is a big one. If the Bengals win here, they will undoubtedly be closer to a playoff spot, which they will earn upon a Ravens loss. Therefore, I am instituting a new category...
WHO NEEDS TO WIN: Bengals. Their season has been, for the most part, a success, triumphing over a surge by Andy Dalton, an impressive season by A.J. Green, and a revitalized defense thanks to James Harrison. A win here would be excellent to keep them in the lead in the playoff chase.
Who should win: Bengals, because they have done the most this season, and they have the most on the line.
Who will win: Bengals. The Vikings, if they win, will be winning for no other reason than to make Detroit feel really bad about themselves. They probably aren't going to win, too; AP is out, their QB is Matt Cassell, and they're really cooked. The Bengals are winning this game, unless something absolutely catastrophic happens.
Overall: Bengals over Vikings, by a minimally wide margin.

Colts vs. Chiefs:
Both of these teams are already in the playoffs. The Colts are here because they are so much better than everyone else in their division. The Chiefs are here because they're so much better than the competition for the wild card.
Who should win: Chiefs. Andy Reid has done something unheard of; he's taken a team with literally no shot to win last year, and made them into playoff contenders. And not even a 'oh, they made it, alright, how'd that happen' scenario. They are earning this wild card spot, even if they have enough wins to clinch any other division. They are just sharing one with one of the other best teams in the league.
Who will win: Chiefs. Even if the Colts have a spectacular game, the Chiefs are still the better team, and can come back from that kind of deficit. I really like them this year, too, and I'm not just saying that because it's an excuse to see Andy Reid wear red.
Overall: Chiefs over Colts.

Buccaneers vs. Rams:
Good God, I have absolutely no clue.
Who should win: Rams, I guess? Because they have more wins?
Who will win: Yeah, Rams. I'm going with the Rams. You go, Rams.
Overall: RAMS over Bucs.

Browns vs. Jets:
Another inconsequential game. And two teams that stunk up the joint, despite winning a few.
Who should win: Browns, because I like them better.
Who will win: Jets, because they win when I don't want them to.
Overall: Jets over Browns. Sobbing Weeden.

Cowboys vs. Redskins:Here we go, boys and girls. This one is absolutely huge. If the Cowboys win here, whether or not the Eagles win or lose, they are still alive in the playoffs. Which means if they win here, Tony Romo still has a potential chance to make the Super Bowl.
Who NEEDS to win: Cowboys. Even if I absolutely despise them, I know it when a team needs to win, and even if they're sucking, they need it this year.
Who should win: Redskins. I know, they suck this year, and I know their QB is Kirk Cousins, but I don't care. I absolutely NEED them to win. If they win, I don't have to worry about anything else, save for if my Eagles lose.
Who will win: Redskins. Somebody needs to pull something huge. I mean it.
Overall: Redskins over Cowboys.

Titans vs. Jaguars:
Battle for 2nd place in a losing division?
Who should win: Titans
Who will win: Jaguars. Because anything can happen when absolutely no one is watching.
Overall: Jags over Titans.

Saints vs. Panthers:
Okay, THIS ONE is huge. Both these teams have the exact same record right now. Whoever wins will clinch, whoever loses will be in for the wild card. And these teams are both really good. So, both of them need to win.
Who should win: Panthers. Right now, they are the better team. As awesome as Drew Brees has been this season, Cam Newton has been 5 steps ahead, and he's been really wowing some people. I think that going in today, the Panthers have the highest chance of winning.
Who will win: Saints. I know, I just talked up the Panthers, but I have a feeling that today is going to be big for the Saints. I don't know how they're gonna win it, I just see them winning it. It may not actually happen, but I have a fonder appreciation for them this year. I hope they get it.
Overall: Saints over Panthers, by a very slim margin.

Broncos vs. Texans:
Last year, this game would have been considered a high profile playoff game.
Who should win: Broncos.
Who will win: Broncos. So much for that.
Overall: Broncos over Texans. It isn't even close.

4 PM GAMES

Chargers vs. Raiders:
Neither of these teams have any shot at making the playoffs. So, I'm gonna take a wild guess.
Who should win: Chargers.
Who will win: Chargers. It's not that hard, guys.
Overall: Chargers over Raiders.

Lions vs. Giants:
Battle of the third place teams!
Who should win: Lions, even though they are down by Green Bay by a half-inch
Who will win: Giants. This should fix that.
Overall: Giants over Lions.

Cardinals vs. Seahawks:
Forget the fact that the Cardinals have more wins than anyone in the NFC North right now. The Seahawks, if everything goes right, are a Super Bowl team this year. Really. They are playing beautifully, and they deserve something close to a nice playoff run.
Who should win: Seahawks. They're already in the playoffs, so let's see them beat down another team.
Who will win: Seahawks. The Cardinals are a great team, let's not deny that. However, they are playing Seattle. Russell Wilson is on his A-Game this year, and so are his receivers. This might be close, but the Seahawks should have it.
Overall: Hawks over Cards.

Steelers vs. Packers:
If the Packers win today, they are still alive. They NEED to win today.
Who should win: Packers. I don't care if Rodgers is out, I don't care if they're slumping. I do not care. I think that they have a shot at winning today. If Matt Flynn plays like he's been playing, they're going to win.
Who will win: Packers. If Ben Roethlisberger plays like he's been playing, the Packers are going to win. Go. Packers.
Overall: Packers over Steelers.

Patriots vs. Ravens:
You'll notice that the Patriots have not clinched their division yet. You'll also notice that I am OVERJOYED about said fact.
Who should win: Ravens
Who will win: Ravens. Both these teams need it. Baltimore wants it more.
Overall: Ravens over Patriots. Wide margin.

8 PM GAME:

Bears vs. Eagles:
The Eagles have a lead. Tonight, they NEED to keep it. The Bears also have a lead. Tonight they need to lose it. It's going to be a battle of which team is better, and which team wants it more.
Who should win: Eagles. I'm not just saying this because I'm biased. I'm saying this because the Eagles have been through a LOT since McNabb left. A lot of awful seasons, a lot of bloodshed, a lot of Michael Vick. Here, they have a chance to finally win, and make the playoffs in a season where they've redeemed themselves. Nick Foles needs to play well today.
Who will win: Eagles. The Bears are a great team, really they are. And they are used to this kind of weather. But I honestly think that the Eagles are tougher than they are. The Bears have a different QB (unless Cutler's back, I forget), and they have a lot more inconsistencies than the Eagles do, which says something. If the Bears win, I'll be fine. But I'd personally prefer the Eagles take it.
Overall: Eagles over DAAAAAAA Bearss.

MONDAY NIGHT:

Falcons vs. 49ers:
Not even close.
Who should win: Niners
Who will win; Niners
Overall: Niners over Falcons. Well done, boys.

So, those are my predictions. Let's watch the fur fly.

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